Death wish
Andrew Gross
January 8, 2025
Last month Brian Thompson - the 50 year-old CEO of the UnitedHealthcare insurance company - was assassinated in New York City. Thompson was shot from behind while he was walking to an annual investors' meeting at the New York Hilton Midtown hotel. Five days later Luigi Mangione, a 26 year-old unemployed data engineer originally from Maryland, was arrested in Pennsylvania. At the time of this article, Mangione has been charged with first-degree murder and other crimes. [1]
What is unusual in this case is that a significant number of Americans have expressed happiness at Thompson's murder, and many consider Mangione a hero. [2] In a survey taken within two weeks of the assassination, 69% of respondents said that denials of coverage was a great deal or at least moderately responsible for Thompson's death, and 67% blamed health insurance company profits. [3]
Morbid desires
These reactions reminded me of several death wishes made by anti-circumcision fanatics. I've read comments in which they have wished for me to die. One expressed specifically that he was praying for my death. [4] Bear in mind that I've never performed a circumcision. I've never recommended circumcision. I've never encouraged a parent to circumcise her son. I've never advocated for circumcision. I've never promoted circumcision. [5]
With respect to circumcision I haven't considered myself to be someone of consequence, like Brian Morris or Dr. Andrew Freedman. This morbid hatred exists simply because I refute intactivist myths, I provide factual information, and I support parents who choose circumcision and medical professionals who perform the procedure.
Deranged intactivists have wished for the early demise of other parents choice and pro circumcision advocates. Hundreds have hoped for the deaths of circumcision practitioners: doctors, nurses, and mohels, whether active or retired. [6] Using the psydonym Nat Taggart a fanatic once wrote to a California mohel, "You deserve to die... I hope they burn you alive, literally burn you on a stake over a flaming heap... If there were no repercussions I would kill every mohel I could myself." [7][8]
Intactivists place a cheap value on human life. Many have expressed a wish for babies to die. An intactivist in Indiana told a grieving mother whose child had died from a bedsharing accident that her son's death was "justice" for her circumcision decision. [9] Following the death of a 7 week-old boy born with a congenital heart defect, strangers told the grieving family that they deserved for their son to die. The intactivists contacted local newspapers and also the coroner to request a copy of the autopsy report. [10]
Quintin Riis wrote that he hoped that a certain newborn would die so that the baby's mother would regret having him circumcised. When other intactivists pushed back, Riis described a hypothetical scenario in which he would be willing to murder 1,000 innocent children in order to criminalize circumcision worldwide. [6] Alex Randall decided that the Holocaust was actually good - because it prevented a million circumcisions. His warped thought process was as follows: had the 6 million murdered Jews lived, among them they would have produced perhaps a million Jewish baby boys. By killing the 6 million, Hitler prevented one million Jewish boys from being conceived, born, and then circumcised. [6]
Some intactivists even devalue their own lives. For example, Daniel Tati wrote, "I so wish that I died from circumcision complications. That would have been so much better than having to live my life as a circumcised man." [6] A few have committed suicide - most notably Jonathon Conte, leader of Bay Area Intactivists, in 2016. [11]
Celebrating death
Intactivists celebrate the deaths of their perceived enemies. The Blood Stained Men have traveled to Michigan to stand on the grave of John Kellogg, the cereal inventor who promoted circumcision as a punishment for boys caught masturbating. [12] In July 2014 a Russian missile destroyed Malaysian Airlines Flight 17, killing all 198 people onboard. When she learned that a group of passengers were researchers on their way to an AIDS conference, Hollie Redinger sneered that "karma has a way of doing her job." [13] Brian Herrity, a member of the Blood Stained Men board of directors, replied, "BURN, BABY FUCKERS! BURN!!!" [14] (The intactivists assumed that the AIDS researchers all supported infant circumcision as a protective measure against HIV.) In other words, intactivists who claim they stand for children's rights celebrated a disaster that resulted in the deaths of 80 children.
Dr. Edgar Schoen was chair of the 1988 AAP Task Force on Circumcision. Schoen's obituary indicated that the physician had a long, fulfilling life. He served in the U.S. Navy during the Korean War, and he authored more than 100 published medical articles. His hobbies included jogging, skiing, tennis, music, and theater. He was married to the love of his life for 56 years; they had two children and four grandchildren. In August 2016 he passed away peacefully at home, in his sleep, surrounded by loved ones. [15]
On August 28, 2016 Daniel Seely posted a link to the obituary. [16] Seely's intactivist friends piled on, expressing their delight in Schoen's death, and hoping that he was suffering in the afterlife. The reaction of one particular elder naysayer was astonishing. Marilyn Milos has been described as the compassionate nurse who founded the intactivist movement. [17][18] The 76 year-old "compassionate" nurse wrote that if she were to attend the memorial service, "I would carry balloons and dance on his casket." She closed by hoping that babies' "tortured screams" would "haunt him for eternity." [19]
What happened next calls to mind the titular quote of Ernest Hemmingway's classic war novel. During the afternoon of August 29, Seely awoke from a nap, suffered a massive heart attack, and died. While Edgar Schoen had expired at the ripe old age of 91, Daniel Seely was just 55. He had spent much of the precious final day of his life obsessing about politics and circumcision on social media. The juxtaposition of intactivist delight over Schoen's death with their grief over Seely's demise was striking. Redinger, Seely's closest friend, was particularly distraught. Her earlier taunt about karma became tragically ironic.
"Never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee." [20]
Some intactivists have even traveled hundreds of miles to harass and assault medical providers. In 2013 Kenneth Hopkins (the leader of the Blood Stained Men who calls himself "Brother K") was enraged by a Facebook post from a proud nurse about the first circumcision of her career. He drove 820 miles (1,320 km) from Sacramento, California to Spokane, Washington. then filmed himself entering the office and trying to confront the unsuspecting nurse on camera. [21] Six year later Hopkins traveled 900 miles to Denver, Colorado, where he and two other men barged into a medical office building. After they falsely claimed that they were there for a medical appointment or emergency, Hopkins assaulted a female doctor whom he had identified as a circumcision provider. [22]
David Wilson is a longtime protester with the Blood Stained Men. When Circumcision Choice members counter-protested outside the 2023 AAP National Conference in Washington DC, Wilson made a cutthroat gesture toward me. I don't take the threat lightly, based on Wilson's lengthy criminal record, which allegedly includes multiple counts of domestic violence. [23]
Conclusion
Death is an inescapable fact of life. Every one of the 8 billion people currently alive, including you - the person reading this sentence, will die at some point. My own mortality could happen in the next 50 seconds or the next 50 years. When I do pass on, I have no doubt that if there are any intactivists around, they will react as they did toward Schoen and others. In heaven I would be pleased to know that they were holding a big celebration for my death. A party would be an implicit acknowledgement that in fact I am someone of consequence; that my actions have been important; and that my work will make a difference long into the future.
I have never celebrated anyone's death. [24] Not the assassination of September 11 mastermind Osama bin Laden by American Navy SEALs; nor the more recent executions of terrorist leaders Ismail Haniyeh and Yahya Sinwar by Israeli forces. I hearken to Talmudic wisdom that a rabbinic friend expressed shortly after the barbaric October 7 massacre of 1,200 Israelis. He said, "We [Jews] pray not for the death of our enemies, but that they repent and that they change their ways." [25-27]
Related
[1] Lola Fadulu; "What to Know About the Charges Against Luigi Mangione"; New York Times, December 18, 2024
[2] Jessica Winter; "The Making of a Modern Antihero"; New Yorker; December 13, 2024
[3] Linley Sanders et al; "Most Americans blame insurance profits and denials alongside the killer in UHC CEO death, poll finds"; Associated Press; December 27, 2024
[4] coperrra; comment on GrossCutters subredding; Reddit; May 11, 2023
[5] In the interest of full disclosure: I once made a donation to a Facebook fundraiser for the circumcisions of twin boys. My sole motive was retaliation against intactivists who were harassing the expectant mother. I then made a second donation in retaliation against a woman who demanded that I watch intactivist videos and explain why I had made the initial donation. Andrew Gross; Facebook message to Frances Garry; January 10, 2018. "Because you refused to answer my question, I won't answer any more of your questions. But here's what I will do. I'll make another donation right now to Ashley to help pay for her twins' circumcisions. I'll make the donation specifically because of you. Goodbye."
[6] "Is intactivism a cult?"; Circumcision Choice; June 8, 2019
[7] "Mr. Nat Taggart"; email to Dr. Fred Kogen; April 17, 2012
[8] Andrew Gross; "It's time for anti-circumcision activists to stop the bullying"; Jewish Weekly of Northern California; April 17, 2015; republished (with permission) by Circumcision Choice; April 16, 2021
[9] Anonymous; text message to C.W.; March 31, 2018
[10] Jill Haskins; "The Magnitude of Our Loss"; The Real Life of a Redhead; August 13, 2013
[11] "Intactivism is a mental disorder"; Circumcision Choice; May 7, 2019
[12] "Kellogg's Crusade"; Circumcision Choice; December 4, 2017
[13] Hollie Ann Redinger; Facebook post; July 18, 2014. Redinger mistakenly believed that 108 of the passengers were headed to the conference, when in fact just 6 such attendees were onboard the ill-fated flight.
[14] Brian Herrity; Facebook coment on Redinger's post; July 18, 2014
[15] "Obituaries - Edgar J. Schoen"; San Francisco Chronicle; August 25, 2016
[16] Daniel Seely, Facebook post; August 28, 2016
[17] James Loewen; "Marilyn Milos - NOCIRC"; Bonobo YouTube channel; June 6, 2009. "Marilyn Milos, the compassionate nurse who founded NOCIRC..."
[18] "IOTN - Marilyn Milos"; Intact America blog; April 10, 2012. "This Mother’s Day, as we honor the women, mothers, and grandmothers who have impacted our lives, Intact America celebrates the 'founding mother' of the intactivist movement - Marilyn Milos, RN."
[19] Marilyn Fayre Milos; Facebook comment on Seely's post; August 28, 2016
[20] Ernest Hemingway; "For Whom the Bell Tolls"; Charles Scribner's Sons; October 21, 1940. The quote, in the epigraph, is Meditation XVII from poet John Donne's "Devotions Upon Emergent Occasions," published in 1624.
[21] "The intactivist who drove 800 miles to stalk a nurse"; Circumcision Choice; February 26, 2018
[22] "Blood Stained Men invade a medical office building; assault female doctor"; Circumcision Choice; July 16, 2019
[23] "The 2023 AAP Counter-Protest"; Circumcision Choice; November 14, 2023
[24] When Fred Phelps - a hateful reverend who founded the notorious Westboro Baptist Church - was on his deathbed, I wrote that "rather than picket his funeral, it would be a more fitting tribute if everyone just ignores it." Andrew Gross; Facebook post; March 16, 2014
[25] Rabbi Mark Bloom; speech at "Solidarity With Israel Rally" (3:51-3:57); San Francisco; October 29, 2023
[26] Ezekiel 18:23, 33:11; Proverbs 24:17; Talmud Berachot 10a
[27] See also: Tzvi Freeman; "Is It OK to Celebrate the Elimination of an Arch-Terrorist?"; Chabad; May 11, 2011
Comments